The Importance of Goals

For years I lived a Type A life. Each waking hour had perceived purpose. After all, didn’t repeated achievement lead to success?

I set goals—annual, monthly, weekly, and daily. I owned a Franklin Planner, and I never went anywhere without it. I loved Stephen Covey and his “habits.” I professed the genius of David Allen’s advice in his best-seller, Getting Things Done. During my thirties, forties, and much of my fifties, I volunteered on boards and attended endless meetings. I even made this passion a job … first as an “organizational consultant” for small business owners and then as an “independent college admissions consultant.” When I wasn’t busy with family life, I focused on community service, helped executives organize their work life, and assisted high school kids in the college application process. Needless to say, my life centered around doing.

It was during these decades of meticulous planning and constant movement that I evolved into a classic over-achiever.

But then, life shifted. While I couldn’t put my finger on it, I knew something was missing. How could that be? I was doing so much.

Over time, it became crystal clear there was more to life than merely doing. Though resistant at first, I eventually found interest in the art of being. What would that be like? How might letting go of doing to allow for being change me?

For several years, I struggled to release the inner drive to constantly get things done. When finally able to surrender this compulsion, I learned how to take things slower, create meaningful morning rituals, and commit to practices such as yoga and meditation. I read the books, attended the workshops, went on retreats.

While my days felt beautiful, the sensation that something was missing eventually returned. I had no intention of returning to my former dysregulated nervous system fueled by caffeine and sugar. However, I realized just being was not enough. I wanted more from life. I needed goals.

It had been a while since I’d written goals. Did I need to make them SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound), as I had learned through Junior League training? Yet that seemed like too much doing. Did they need to cover various categories, or could I merely pick what I wanted to achieve? I decided there were no rules I needed to follow, so I merely sat in my office with a cup of tea and wrote what I hoped to accomplish before the year’s end.

When I finished, I had eight goals. Several seemed easy to achieve if I consistently showed up. Yet others would require hard work coupled with trust.

First, I tackled the simple ones. I woke up one hour earlier, immediately made the bed, and got out of my robe and into my workout clothes. These newly found early hours felt peaceful, allowing a sense of being while knowing there would still be plenty of time later for doing.

After I had a new foundation to begin my day, I committed to completing a solid draft of my next book by December 31^st. Surprisingly, words began to flow. No longer was I struggling to envision a story line or create believable characters. Somehow, it all just happened, reminding me how much I love to write.

By prioritizing what I need to do for myself first thing each day, my mornings began to flow into days peppered with productivity and creativity. Once this felt natural, it became time to tackle my “stretch goals.”

Admittedly, these are whiat I hope to accomplish, knowing I can’t necessarily control the results. For example, one of my goals is to break 90 on our golf course. Another is to rehab my body so I can return to comfortably running three times a week. I’m making progress, but I’m still not there yet.

Will any of these goals set the world on fire? Absolutely not, but they’re lighting a spark within me. Merely writing down specific ways to improve my life helps me wake up energized, excited to begin the day. But there’s more. I now have patience with myself and others. I’m less judgmental and better able to see various perspectives. Most importantly, I’m understanding what’s mine to control and what’s not. Somehow, creating a set of goals brought an underlying structure to my life, renewing my passion and purpose.

Perhaps the ultimate lesson I’ve learned is that doing and being are both important. While one may dominate certain phases of life, right now, I want both. Of course, this requires balance. And now that I’m doing more, I don’t want to lose the beauty and peace that being taught me. It’s about listening to my body, honoring my soul, and trusting my intuition to guide when I need to pick up the pace as well as when it’s time to rest.

We are here, in Earth School, to learn and evolve. I discovered that while being is important, so is doing. I suppose I needed of few years at a slower pace to comprehend this.

Will I reach all my goals? I hope so, but if I don’t, there’s bound to be lessons along the way. And so, I’ll keep moving forward, setting more goals while attempting to find balance between doing and being.

Am I there yet? Absolutely not. But I’m making progress.